Speed Bump

I’ve implemented a new policy at work. It’s called the Dachshund Speed Bump. Anyone traveling through the shop must slow down to pet me. This has been initiated because far too many people are entering and leaving the shop without saying hello to me. These people do not know what they are missing!

In order to get the ball rolling on this new store policy, I have strategically placed myself on the shop floor, camouflaged as a speed bump. Anyone who tries to cross without petting me will have their ankles bitten. (ok I’m lying….I don’t bite, but I WILL be thinking about it)!

That is all.

#1 Store Employee,
Ammo the Dachshund

A Safe Place for Bones

A trip to the bank might seem like a common nuisance of a chore to you, but to a little doxie like me, it’s a big adventure. I mean it’s hard enough for me to write out my deposit slip with these cumbersome paws!

So imagine my surprise when my local bank in town invited me inside! See I’m practically a celebrity over there. They have my newspaper article hanging in the lobby, and every time I come in the ladies & gents swoon over me. I have to admit, I am pretty dashing.

The peeps in the bank even offered up a safety deposit box for me, shall I ever need a more secure place to keep my bones. A pretty tempting offer, should my ‘rents ever find my secret stash. Shhh! Don’t tell.

Waiting at the crosswalk

Always look both ways before crossing the street

safely made it across the street to the bank

Where did you say that safety deposit box was?

..and back across the street again

home sweet home. back to the shop.

Arch Nemesis

I’m a pretty tough dude. I hunt rodents, perform tricks with ponies, guard the house from intruders, and bravely stare danger in the face. But there is one thing that frightens me! ….

..Vacuums!

They make scary noises, the suck things up (perhaps little Dachshunds too), and they just give me the heebie-jeevies. Do you blame me? Me and the vacuum don’t have any horrible incidents in our past, so I’m not sure why I hate him so much. Perhaps it’s because my bestest pal Trooper is afraid of vacuums. I think for now I’ll just have to blame my fear on him!

ammo hiding

Hiding from my arch nemesis

ammo hiding

Please...just leave me alone!

ammo hiding

I just know he's around there somewhere!